Cast in a New Role
by Lindsey Quiggle
Disappointment. It can fill you up, then leave you empty. There is no greater disappointment than to prepare, practice, extend yourself out of your comfort zone, then have all your hard work and dedication crash down. In theatre and film, the chance of being turned down is eighty out of one hundred. The stakes are always high.
Recently my abilities were tested to their max. Callbacks are the most frightening, yet exciting, day in any actor’s life. A callback is your one chance for the part you want. I arrived at callbacks prepared. The audition boiled down to reading from the script and vocalizing the notes from the paper. After three-and-a-half hours, the director’s final selection was whittled down to myself and three other immensely talented and lovely girls. The intensity had risen. The director had each of us sing a song from the script–first together, then separately. After we each had our chance to serenade the director, we returned to our seats to wait in suspense. Casting her eyes over her notes, the director inquired of me if I would sing the selection over. This is the most terrifying part of a callback. How I present yourself and perform the selection determines what part you will be cast in the show. One wrong note could change the intended outcome for myself. Walking up to the stage, I could feel my heart beating faster and faster; my cheeks were flushed; I was the complete embodiment of nervousness. After returning to the center of the stage, everything passed in a blur. Before I knew it, I was in the car and on my way home. By then it was out of my hands and the only thing left to do was wait. I did not wait long. The next day the cast list was posted. Looking down the line of names, I find my own. My finger stops. Lindsey Quiggle…Chorus. I failed. Weighed down by disappointment, resentment, anger, self doubt, I let on that nothing was amiss until I was in the safety of my room. Running to a pillow, I screamed and cried and let every wild emotion flow out of my heart and into the now sopping wet, disheveled, pillow.
It took almost all of three days to gain back even a little shred of confidence, but an epiphany brought hope to my heart. Quickly emailing the director, I wondered if she would be interested in a Dance Captain, one who leads the cast in the dance numbers. She was ecstatic about my request and readily agreed. The sunlight of possibility was pushing away the dark clouds of failure and a new opportunity could be seen in their gloom.
Even though I was disappointed in the part I was cast in, God turned this experience into a disguised blessing. Irene Molloy was not the part intended for me this time, but I had an extraordinary chance to forge a new role in musical productions at my The Theatre. It was I unexpected, but I am thrilled about my new role. I feel confident, beautiful, untamable when I dance and now I can show others my love for it. It is an enormous responsibility to be Dance Captain, because the dancers will be looking to me for guidance. It is a responsibility I can carry with God’s help, and through me, He will guide my dancers’ feet in the way they should go.